Working with a therapist when we were struggling with communication, has been the best investment we could have ever made.
Things To Consider
Often times people come to therapy because of "communication"problems. What therapy can help both partners understand is what is not being said in all the conversations.
Disagreements are a culmination of resentments and feeling invisible. Let Enso help you both to feel seen and begin to heal the ineffective patterns from the past.
The goal of a couples therapist when the couple is in a crisis is to identify and change patterns that have been harmful and ineffective
The goal of couples counseling when there is not an identifiable crisis is to champion and fine tune the natural evolution of the relationship. Typically these couples attend therapy when they have been married over the course of several phase of life experiences and they want to rebuild on their existing fondness and admiration.
Gottman's Predictors of Divorce:
4 Horsemen of the Apocalypse
Criticism: A criticism attacks the character and personality of your partner. "Why are you so forgetful? I hate having to always sweep the kitchen floor when it's your turn. You just don't care"
Contempt: sarcasm, cynicism, eye rolling, name calling, sneering, cutting your teeth, and hostile humor are types of contempt. Contempt is the worst of the 4 horsemen and is poisonous to a relationship because it conveys disgust.
Defensiveness: Defensiveness is really a way of blaming your partner and escalates the conflict. Defensiveness is providing "reasons" why your partners feelings and perceptions are wrong.
Stonewalling: When a partner "tunes out" or shuts down. Where nothing get's in and nothing goes out. Often this results in the other partner escalating their criticism and contempt, subconsciously looking for a response.
These four negative interactions are lethal to relationships.
It's time to work on your relationship
Enso approaches couples counseling with a holistic and human approach. We are unbiased observers who guide the process of communication. We help both partners to communicate effectively and aim to reduce the occurrence of intense arguments at home.
Let a Gottman Method Trained Counselor support your relationship. Book your appointment today!
Experience from Couples Therapy...
"Angie truly saved our marriage. She helped us work through the issues in our relationship that almost broke us. We struggled for so long with communication and not understanding each other. Today, I can honestly say that we've never been happier, and we are working on getting closer and making our marriage stronger every day!"
The Gottman Relationship Checkup not only automatically scores a couple’s strengths and challenges. The questionnaire consists of 480 questions about friendship, intimacy, emotions, conflict, values, and trust, as well as parenting, housework, finances, individual areas of concern, and more.
Take the Assessment for $75
Angie Speller, LMHC
Gottman Level 2 Certified
Valerie Rojas, RMHCI
Gottman Method Trained
Holly Cummings, RMHCI
Gottman Method Trained
Rachel Sobiech, LCSW
LGBTQIA+ Couples Counselor